chemoed

I've been- poked, prodded, stuck, blood sucked out, chemicals pumped in. In short, chemoed.

Yesterday I met with the estimable Dr D, which always fun as well as being helpful and informative. He always looks at the whole patient, as opposed to the specialists who tend to look at the disease. Anyway, he gave me a script for my toe, which seems to have acquired chronic cellulitis, whatever that is. I've had 4 treatment cycles with k-flex, to no avail. It gets better, then comes back after the k-flex is over. This time I've got something stronger. He also said that the only objective measure of how I am doing is my weight. (He knows that I know what he means by 'objective'.) My weight is holding in the low 154s and has been for a month or so.

Today was Geisinger Medical Center. They did their usual thing- took blood, ran quick analyses, measured vitals, the talk to J the PA. She is really happy- says I'm responding just the way they want me to. Counts are good, including the WBC which I've had trouble with. She is also very impressed by my level of reduced pain, better digestion, and the like. She will talk to Dr W re a CT scan in the near future. And she is so nice that she is trying to schedule around the ACS meeting in Philly. In short, she's pushing that old gorilla around pretty good.

Shook!

The Western front got all shook up yesterday. We watched some of it on the LA tv stations. The denizen of the Western front is fine; she posted in her blog yesterday afternoon. Click on Bootstrap Productions on the list on the right margin. She hadn't seen her apt. yet.

All quiet (and still) here. We made another batch of tomato-spinach-basil soup and had it with tomato/feta cheese with red wine for dinner. Outstanding! And, no gastric distress!

My office is finally starting to see a little order. I'm trying to minimise stearic hindrance, which is an expression my first boss in chemistry used for my habit (then) of working in a very messy lab. I'd just shove things to the back of the lab bench until there wasn't any room to work. I learned to clean up as I went, until I kinda turned into a neat freak by the time I retired. Anyway, I got all my medical papers into one thick file. My table actually has a clear top. I found a fair amount of stuff I didn't know I had. For example, I have 3 Paper-Mate refills. Apparently I'd buy one, it would get buried, and I'd buy more. I used to carry a Paper-Mate pen.

This afternoon I see Dr D, my PCP, then tomorrow morning I go into Geisinger for my chemo etc. So tomorrow the blog will be late in the day. Don't panic- it'll be along.

Burnt!

What was coming next was a burnt hand. I was happily grilling pork chops, and after turning them reached out to close the grill cover without looking and grabbed the top of the grill (HOT!) instead of the handle. Wow! Closed the cover with the other hand and ran to the laundry room sink (only 4 steps, actually) and the cold water. Thence to the freezer and ice. Iced until the hand was getting numb, and the pork chops were done. (They were excellent with red wine.) The hand felt pretty good- only a little sore and stiff. By this morning it's fine- like it never happened. Moving fast is the trick- get the burn under cold water fast!

We got the new file cabnet up to my office. I did skin my elbow in the process, but that's all. Now I have to sort and file my medical records. As you may imagine, there are a lot of them.

Weather in the EF is really nice, but it's getting a little dry. We missed the storms that were forecast through the weekend. We generally have a dry period in August, where the grass goes dorment for a while. Kinda looks like that will be happening soon.

I dreamed about work again last night. This time I was trying to get a lab running. Everybody was standing around or working at cross purposes, where one person would set up something and the next would take it down, resulting in arguments which I had to referee. It really was a group leaders nightmare!

Stung!

What next, you may ask. I was out cutting grass, which tired me a little more than I thought it would. Afterword I sat down in the shade with a cold drink, and felt some insect crawling on my face. So I flapped my hand at it, you know how that goes, and it got up under my shades and then stung me. Hat and glasses went flying, and I swatted the bug to the ground. Looks like a mud wasp to me. I called for Mom to get the after bite stuff, she did, and it really works. Pain stopped almost immediately. I now have a wasp sting on me left cheekbone, right under the eye.

During the quest on Saturday, we acquired a new 2-drawer file cabinet. We have the old one down to the garage, and the new one at the foot of the stairs. At that point, I had to sit down for a while. I'm a lot weaker than I was. That gorilla is taking it's toll.

I dreamed about being at work last night; that's the first time I've done so that I remember. I was in a discussion about playing softball and mentioned that I have cancer and so very little endurance. (I did play softball on the company team back in Muskegon back in the early 70's.)Somewhere in my head I realized that I shouldn't have cancer in my dream, so that woke me up. That sort of thing happens when dreaming rather often- I realize I've lost the boundary between dream and real universe, and that wakes me. Probably a good thing.

Several days ago I defined at least to myself what it is I miss about work- the rigor in the thinking that chemistry requires. Not that I want everyday life to be rigorous, but I miss the intellectual exercise of focused thinking and data based conclusions and carrying two different theories which contradict each other in your head and all the rest of it. Thinking was always the best part, I guess. Cooking requires some of this, which is probably why good chemists tend to be good cooks, not an original observation.

Quest

We did a real old-fashioned quest yesterday. Williamsport, Montoursville, Lycomng mall etc. We also stopped for lunch at Johnsons in Montoursville. I had an outstanding Reuben sandwich, which had no ill effect at all. We found most of what we were looking for, but not all. A big "want" is for a double bladed skewer for grilling shrimp. If you're not careful putting the shrimp on the skewer, the heavy side will rotate the shrimp, making it impossible to turn them. I saw one on the Food Channel, and Amazon has a set for about $12 with $11 for shipping. Nice lady at the kitchen store in the mall agreed it would be handy, but she didn't have any.

We stopped at the Amish veggie stand on the way home and got a tomato, which we had with Feta cheese and olive oil for the first course for dinner. Outstanding with red wine. Second course was grilled shrimp. We put them on the skewer by putting the skewer through the shrimp twice, on the thick end and the thin end. No rotation. Excellent with red wine. No gastric distress from any of it.

Looks like the Northern Front may have some bear around, based on a photo of some scat. Hmmm. Don't leave the grandbaby out by herself!

As a consequence of all the questing, we were really tired last night and slept really well until the thunderstorms rolled through. That not only woke us, it kicked the power off long enough to crash the electric clocks. So this morning I got my watch and mis-read it so we didn't get up until 8! I was able to talk the dog into going back to bed. So today we're running a little late.

The gorilla is being really cooperative, as long as I keep up the pain killer. I'm eating foods that would have caused considerable distress several months ago. There seems to be no effect. I seem to have more energy and less pain too. This week I get to see Dr D, my PCP, on Wednesday, and then have another chemo treatment and see the PA on Thursday.

STORK?

I drove out of the valley to Wal-Mart- along the way there was this strange looking large bird standing in the middle of the roak. It looked for all the world like a gray stork, or at least what I would think a gray stork would look like. There were two of them; the second one was sitting on a fence post. I slowed down, but the flew away when I got close. Kind of clumsy take-off, but once they got going they seemed graceful enough. I looked them up in the bird book later- Great Blue Herons. Yeah, yeah, I know- wading birds. What are wading birds doing standing in the middle of a road nowhere near any water? Dunno- it's the enchanted forest!


Wal-Mart was it's usual self, full of rednecks standing in the aisles chatting. I should talk- I'm going to the store to get out of the house for a while. I did pick up a few things, but, really, I just wanted to get out. Pathetic, isn't it. It was kinda fun walking around the store though, looking at everything. They have the "back-to-school" and the hunting stuff out already.

I'm feeling a lot better without the pain. Dinner was tortellini with tomato sauce, which was excellent with red wine. I decided that drifting along, sleeping in the day and being awake at night, was something up with which I was no longer willing to put, so I took a one hour nap in the afternoon and then stayed awake until bedtime. Kinda took myself by the scruff of the neck and said "Take charge of your life". Slept very well. Part of the plan is to drink a few cups of tea during the day to get a caffeine shot to help stay awake. I'm drinking it British style, with milk and sugar. Pretty tasty.

Pain

Pain is not a good thing. Useful, and even necessary, but uncomfortable. I did skip one Oxycontin, and ended up in pain. Not the agonizing can't stand it kind of pain, but the kind where it hurts a little all the time. So I restarted the every 12 hour routine. As a consequence of messing with the gorilla, it wouldn't let me sleep last night, so I'm a little whoosy today. So it was a good experiment in the sense that I got a definite result, albeit a negative one.

No gastric distress today. I had pork chops for dinner- that's it, just pork chops grilled on the outside grill, with the obligatory red wine- and they digested nicely. Seems to me that meat and fat digest well, but too much grain leads to distress. I suppose that's what Dr S at Penn meant when he said eat junk food.

Cold here last night! It was 55 this morning, and that's cold for the end of July. The forecast is for rain for the weekend through Monday. Grass is too short to cut now, but will be knee high by then. O well. It's a beautiful day in the EF today.

Slugfest!

We're having a slugfest in the EF today. The driveway has slugs on it! Not the earthworm thing- they do that too. These are slugs. Dunno what that's about, other than the ground being saturated with water from all the rain yesterday.

The gorilla is being kinda good lately. So good, in fact, that I'm stopping half of the pain meds. I've been taking an oxycontin every 12 hours, and will go to one a day. My pain/discomfort level is so low that there really is no discomfort, which I think of as drug-suppressed pain. We'll see what that brings. I can always restart.

Last night we had an outstanding batch of shrimp scampi with spinach. Really excellent with red wine. It was so good that I ate a second bowl full. Not a good idea. Fair amount of pain from that. It was the normal "ate too much, dummy" pain as opposed to the gorilla pain. Strangely enough, it cured the touch of diarrhea I had. I don't understand any of it.

Drippy

It's a drippy day ion the EF. Rain woke me at 4 or so with thunder and the patter of the rain on the leaves, and it rained since then. Stopped for a while when the dog and I went down for the paper, but it's coming down again. Even then it was dripping from the trees.

Cat is gone to the ASPCA. Good luck, cat, maybe someone will adopt you. They said it's a neutered male, so someone spent a little money on it, as well as feeding it etc. and then dumping it out in the country. It's stupid as well as evil. Don't get me started on so-called people who are cruel to domesticated animals.

I just finished the last of the pie B brought. Boy, is it sticky! Had to de-sticky my desk.

Just lost the satellite signal for the TV. Also for the internet, I see. Happens when the storm clouds get in between the dish antenna and the satellite. Right in the middle of the Tour. Yesterday a guy went off on a little road on the side of the mountain- he just ran off the road, and then slid a fair way down the mountain. Another guy had to down and help him climb back up. I guess the bike shoes don't have much traction; no Vibram soles on those dudes! The bike kept going down the mountain for a while. They brought him another bike and just left his, probably for retrieval later.

Digestion is slightly messed up this AM. I had my usual gross eggs with toast and a cup of hot chocolate, then 20 minutes later an attack of mild diarrhea, which is a pain in the butt. Ho, ho- that's a joke, son! Hmmm- spell checker in Blogger won't work when I'm off the net. Anyway, I figured since digestion is messed up, I might as well have the pie. What else can it do, right? I've asked several times about that phenomenon- that I get an attack 20 minutes after eating. Is that the food I just ate or left over from earlier? Seems awful fast to be what I just ate. Never could get a straight answer.

Note to daughter M: Your description of the asthma sounds just like the descriptions of water boarding I've seen, especially how it feels. A journalist had it done to him to find out. It's not torture- our fearless leader told us so. Hey- if it walks like a duck, sounds like a duck, then just maybe you might find a duck egg around. A Supreme once said he couldn't define porno, but he sure knew it when he saw it. That's how I feel about torture, and they are dong it. IMHO, Bush is the worst president I've lived under, and I go back to Roosevelt.

Awake

This gorilla is playing with me. After a day of sleep, I had a day of awake. Averages out, I guess. I slept for a while in the afternoon, but that’s all. Went to bed nicely at about 11, then laid there and listened to the silence.

We’re having a cat issue again. People drop off unwanted cats out here in the country instead of taking them to the ASPCA. So, Saturday a white cat with only one ear showed up. It was down by the mailbox when B and I took the dog down to get the mail. Cat wasn’t afraid of the dog, although it did hiss when he got too close. We hoped it was a neighbor cat, although we’d never seen it before. It’s spent the weekend working it’s way up the driveway, until it arrived at the house yesterday afternoon. It now is demanding food. It tried to get in the house last evening too. We had to throw water on it to chase it away from the door. Obviously a house cat- goes to the people for food. There are lots of mice around, but it probably never learned to hunt. Cats (and dogs) generally have to be taught that by the parent, although some learn on their own. So now we have to catch it and take it to the ASPCA ourselves. Why do people do that? They obviously had the cat, took some care of it, feed and that, and let it into the house, then decide they don’t want it any more and dump it along the road out in the country. What assholes. We feel sorry for the poor thing- but we don’t want a cat. Throwing water beats the .22, I guess. Less messy too. We’ll let the ASPCA do the dirty work if nobody adopts it.

Back to last night- the cat howled for a little while, then stopped. I felt fine, no pain, not even any discomfort. Just wide awake. Finally did sleep off and on during the night. This AM I was sleeping fine, so much so that the dog never got up until 8, which has put everything including this blog, late. Also, I was playing with the Flight Simulator. Although we say the dog gets us up at 7, that’s not really true. When I wake up and start moving around, that cues him to get up and lick face etc to get me up.

I had a little gastric distress yesterday, probably from all the sweet food we ate over the weekend. Last night I had a steak, after I chased the cat off the deck. Steak was fine- goes real well with red wine, you’ll not be surprised to hear. Digested well too- no distress during the night nor this AM.

Sleep

I slipped into sleep mode again yesterday. In the AM I went out with B to start the lawnmower. Then he mowed while I cut a few wild roses (just a few) and then watched from the lawn chair. This is working out pretty well- invite a person for the weekend the then let them cut the lawn with the riding mower. It kinda smacks of the whitewash the fence thing in Tom Sawyer.

Then we did lunch and B left to go back to Leesburg to cut his own lawn. And worry about their house at Cape Hatteras since the hurricane is scheduled to be there Monday- passed over last night I think. Then I lay down for a nap. Got up after a few hours, had same pie (B brings pie and red wine- gotta love the guy!) while the thunderstorm raged. Back to sleep in front of the ball game, then up again to shower, lay down for another few minutes which turned into several more hours of sleep. Finally got up for a very late dinner which was leftover pasta and chicken sauce with red wine, with which it is excellent. Then to bed at 11 or so and slept the rest of the night. I don’t really know how much I slept, but it was a lot. Gotta keep that gorilla happy. It gets testy if it doesn’t get enough sleep. Note to daughter M: You don’t suppose my sleeping is related to you not sleeping, do you? We’ve had things like that happen before.

Another note to daughter M: A .22 will be right about the speed of sound, so you won’t hear the one that gets you. Still a good plan to duck when you hear a shot in case there is another one about to be fired. When my uncle came back from WWII he’d be under the table whenever there was an unexpected loud noise.

A few days ago I was in bed, lights out and all, and a large dog was barking in the distance. Listening carefully, I could hear voices too, then small dogs barking. All this was quire far away, so not at all loud, but I could hear it. Then “BANG” a shot rang out. (Sounds like a Snoopy novel.) Then nothing- no dogs barking, no voices, absolute quiet, which in the Enchanted Forest is REALLY quiet. Dunno what that was about at all. Can’t think of any scenario that would include those observations. I’ve since heard the large dog, so it wasn’t some xx shooting the dog. Just dunno.

Skunked

Our dog got skunked last night. Our friend B and son J came for the weekend. A few bottles got emptied. I made my world-famous chicken pasta sauce, which, need I say, is excellent with red wine. Last night J took the dog out, he chased something, and got skunked. I dug out a recipe for deskunking ewhich consists mostly of peroxide and bicarb. It worked, mostly. He still has a slight skunk odor, but not bad.

Things are pretty quiet on the gorilla front. Probably setting me up for a bad session.

Better

OK you guys, I officially feel better! Not well, and one should not infer anything about the health of the 800 lb gorilla, but I have considerably less severe symptoms.

I seem to be eating too much for my stomach and intestines to handle. Had gross eggs for breakfast at 7:30 or so, then gorp and Boost at 9, eaten slowly for the next hour. Gorp is really good for snacking since you can nibble on it nicely But at noon I feel overfull yet. Not to give you more information than you need, but I had a good BM somewhere in there too. No diarrhea, no constipation. It’s what passes for good nowadays. The medical people all tell me to eat a lot of high calorie foods to keep my weight up, and gorp and Boost seems the best way to do that. I guess that gorilla is messing with me again. Or still.

Watched another stage of the Tour de Drugs. I still don’t understand what the teams do. They don’t appear to be breaking the wind for the leader or anything. Maybe setting a fast pace to burn out the other teams, but that seems so obvious that you’d think nobody would fall for it. And the whole drug thing has turned the Tour into a farce. I just feel sorry for the guys who are clean and trying to do well. They’re all getting tarred with the same brush.

Reading “6 Glasses That Changed the World” I came across the interesting tidbit that the British Navy in the days of sail actually issued a mixture of rum, lime juice, sugar and water to the sailors, not just rum as I had thought. They called the mixture grog. Hmmm. What does that sound like? Maybe a margarita made with rum? So I tried one. Not bad- I used dark rum and the flavor of the rum really came through. One of these days I’m going to try throwing a little rum into lemon-lime Gator-Aid. Dunno what you would call it, but you could excuse the drinking as a fluid replacement! Maybe Gator-Grog? LOL! Of course, back in the day, when running was really popular, George Sheehan, the running cardiologist, claimed beer was the perfect fluid replacement drink.

Sleep

Sleep! (In agreement with a certain close relative of mine that everything needs one word titles.) Anyway, I lay down for a few minutes after lunch, in the middle of a screaming thunder storm, no less, and slept until 6. Not continuously, what with the thunder and the black dog coming to have me tell him it’s OK, but still. I guess the gorilla gets points for this one. Of course, I didn’t sleep real well last night. I turned the lights out after the Mets game was over, but didn’t get to sleep for a while and then woke up several times.

Baseball is back! Watched a Mets game last night. Now, how about a Cubs game? Baseball (and any sport) is really awesome on HD TV. TV has come a long way since the 9 inch snowy black and white screen.

Foggy day in the EF today, forecast to burn off and get to a high of 92. That’s HOT, even for me and my gorilla. I need to cut some grass somewhere in here too. The problem is waiting until the grass is dry enough to cut well, before it gets too hot to be comfortable. I’m not sure that time really exists every day.

I seem to have developed a shake in my hands, to the point where my computer mouse operation is a little uncertain. I actually use a trackball, but it’s the same idea. Hmm. Dunno what that means; I just offer the observation for whatever it’s worth. Probably the gorilla flexing it's muscles.

Feeling pretty good today. A little discomfort in the guts, but not much. I’m a week away from the last chemo treatment, not a coincidence, I’m sure. The 800 lb gorilla in the room is pretty quiet; the problem is the chemo which is supposed to be on my side. I guess it is. It needs a name, like the gorilla. I know gorillas are really nice peaceful creatures who don’t bother anyone, but still, the image of a large black 800 lb creature in the room which nobody mentions is just too good not to use. Maybe the chemo is a chimp- friendly, but a little bit of a hell-raiser. Any suggestions will be gratefully considered. I really do think I’m a lot better than I was. For on thing, I’m getting bored. I’ve been sick now for almost 18 months, and for most of the time was just trying to survive each day. So I think being bored is a positive sign. Thank you, chimp!

I’ve had the Flight Simulator up and flying. I took off from the Williamsport airport and flew west for a while. My objective is to land at Lock Haven. I can do the “follow the highways” style of navigation.

I’ve been watching “Carrier” on the public TV channel. They really can’t do that. I can get an add-on for FS which has a carrier and jets to fly off and try to land back on. Might be fun!

I got some pants yesterday, so I’m set for Philly. I got two pair, and I’m not sure I need two, but I got them. Pain is still hanging around, but at a low level. Today is haircuts- the excitement never ends. Last evening we grilled some shrimp- great with red wine. Of course, everything is great with red wine, but still, the shrimp was very good.

Watched some of the baseball Al Star game last night. Not very exciting, although it would have been nice for the National League to win so the Cubs would have home-field advantage in the Series, especially in view of their excellent at home record compared to on the road. In case anyone is interested, I think that’s dumb too. Home field in the series should be based on the regular season record. They ought to let me run the world.

Yesterday was not a good day. Fair amount of pain in the guts in the morning, only moderated by the oxy. I did cut some more grass in the afternoon, but had to lie down after. The EF really looks nice today with the grass all fresh cut and the sun shining. The humidity is very low today, so it’s really very comfortable. Pain is at a low level, so I may go to Woolrich to get some pants to wear to Philly to the ACS meeting. I do have a standard dark blue blazer I can wear, so a couple of pairs of slacks in a light color would work with dress shirts and ties in place of a suit.

No baseball- it’s the all-star break. I’ve been watching the Tour de France, which would probably be more interesting if I understood what was going on, other than guys riding fast on bikes. I think they should reduce the motor bikes and support cars travelling with the field. Seems to me to be a disaster waiting to happen.

Political note- every once in a while I hear McCain say something I don’t care for. Like he doesn’t use the internet or email. He’s certainly smart enough- if they could teach him to operate a high speed combat jet from a carrier, he can certainly learn to use a computer. But he won’t. That says something about him I don’t care for.

Showery Sunday afternoon, lots of baseball on TV, and High Definition TV to watch them on. Doesn’t get much better. Of course, if the Cubs won, that would be better, but not by much. It was still a good game, 4-2 so it was even close. I must admit to napping in there too. Cubs are awesome.

Good sleep last night. I’m at chemo plus 4 days, so feeling better. I still have the funny pain in the jaws when I first start eating, also the expected joint pain, but both are getting less severe each day.

Today is a real nice day in the EF- cool, sunny, dry. What’s not to like? I’m about ready for my post-breakfast nap, a little trick I learned from my dog.

I’m kinda on a roller coater. I’m starting feel better, so I do a few things, which tires me out again. So it’s up and down.

Eldest daughter w/spouse & dog are here for the weekend. I put them to work cutting the lawn. I did cook a sauce last evening with tomatoes and chicken which we had over pasta, with warm bread and red wine. Yum! Then I had to lay down for a while.

Lots of rain last night, right after the grass cutting, which works well. Very buggy this morning, of course. I feel almost human. It’s three days after the chemo, so that’s on schedule. One problem is I go from too hot to cold very quickly. Probably time for a nap!

Ugh! The second day after the chemo is once again the worst. I'm totaly out of it today. Seems like the only thing I can do is sleep, so I guess I'll do that until I feel better. I have some joint pain in the left knee and hip, a known side effect. I also get jaw pain when I eat, which is apparantly an unknown side effectg. Nice and warm today, so that's nice.

Went to Geisinger- usual blood-letting, vitals, etc. Counts are up enough so that I got another chemo treatment. It whipped me out. I got home OK, even started loading my new Flight Simulator, then had to go to sleep. NO dinner, no nothing, until 6:00 AM. That’s powerful stuff, and I guess it needs to be to fight that 800 lb gorilla. This morning I’m awake, but still very lethargic, no energy. I have to go back to Geisinger this afternoon for a shot of long-lasting Neupogen which supposed to raise my white blood and other counts. This stuff would cost $3000 a shot if they prescribe it for self- infliction, but there is no cost if they administer it. Go figure the insurance business.

Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?

It’s a glorious day in the EF, as promised, with bright sun and a few white clouds in the sky. The thistles are blooming nicely; I’ll try to remember to get a photo for y’all.

No news from the northern front. I guess they are really busy with unpacking and all.

After spending a rainy afternoon napping, I felt a lot better. Go back to sleep, gorilla! I had no coffee and only a minimum amount of food. Diarrhea is mostly gone, but that’s the best it ever gets. Guess I’ll do without coffee for a while longer.

I slept most of the evening, then all night without any problem. My body seems to have gone into sleep mode. Wonder what that’s about. Maybe the gorilla is telling me to go to sleep.

I’m thinking about spending a few days at the ACS National Meeting in Philly next month. I’d like to stimulate the old brain before it atrophies completely, plus I’d like to see if there is any action on the global warming front. To me, one answer is to reduce the CO2 back to methanol or methane, then reburn it. The chemistry will certainly work; the costs etc. are in question. This is a chemical question, and it seems to me that the ACS being the professional chemical society should be more active than it is on this front. Anyone else thinking of attending?

It’s a sunny day in the Enchanted Forest; forecast is for dry today and tomorrow. Maybe I’ll be able to cut some grass. Today is my trip to Geisinger for the check-up and more chemo. How fun. It’s an afternoon appointment, so I may not be able to post the results, if any, until late today or maybe even tomorrow.

Ugh. Bad day- I’ve got some diarehha, lots of discomfort in the guts, and to add insult to injury, a hemeroid. And I didn’t sleep very well last night either. It rained last night, during the night, and it’s really humid today. Very buggy in the EF today. Forecast is for more rain too.

My Flight Simulator hasn’t shown up yet either.

Tomorrow is the next visit to the oncologist at Geisinger. They’ll probably do a chemo treatment, which is followed by another week of oral chemo, all of which knocks me down. The only bright spot is I get to sleep real well when I’m on it. I’ve got my desk under some sort of control so I can move the keyboard and use the joystick when FS arrives. Here’s a photo:

I believe some old friends from my work days are reading the blog. Welcome! Feel free to comment, pass on the blog url to anyone else who might be interested, or just read if that floats your boat. I do see some of the State College crew on occasion, especially at the ROC ex-employees dinners, and several have stopped by to say hi, which is highly appreciated.

That 800 lb gorilla in the room is a little restive this morning. A little discomfort in the guts, a little diarrhea. It doesn’t rise to the level of pain, probably because of the narcotics I’m on. Funny though- even the bad days are now better than the bad days used to be. Strange.

Weather is sticky today, which may be contributing to the discomfort. It’s warm and humid after the rain last night. Highly buggy out there when Rollo and I went down for the paper at 7.

I’ve been falling asleep watching the ball game in the evenings, after taking a nap in the afternoon, and last night woke up at about 3:30 all done sleeping. Well duh! I need to work at staying awake until bedtime.

I ordered a new Flight Simulator and joystick from Amazon; the joystick arrived yesterday. It’s big! Now I need to reconfigure my desk so everything fits without any steric hindrance. Maybe I’ll be able to fly in the evenings while watching the ball games which could help me stay awake.

Yesterday turned out to be a very good day. Minimum of pain, ditto diarrhea. We got to hang out with our son, then grilled some steaks for dinner, with which we had red wine. Yum! Actually, the gorilla is being quite good. I feel better than I have for months. Do NOT jump to any conclusions about cures or the like. Just let me enjoy the good days; the bad ones come along soon enough.

Funny, before this all started I always wondered how I would react to this sort of situation. In fact, I believe there is a movie about that out now- the “Bucket List” or something since it deals with what you would do if told you are going to kick the bucket. Turns out I just want to live the life I have. I have no unfulfilled fantasies to go somewhere or see something. We’ll probably go up to Maine to see the grandbaby (and her parents) but that’s about it.

The Wimbledon men’s final was an awesome match, won eventually by Nadal. It literally took all day, admittedly with two rain delays. They’re funny when they cover the courts- they run out there and run the tarps across the court so fast that the players have to scramble to not get covered. John McEnroe chocked up both himself and Roger trying to do the post match interview. Not a dry eye in the house. I guess, unlike baseball, there is crying in tennis.

Sounds like all is quiet on the Northern front, finally. Moving is such fun. Of course, they may not be done yet since I don’t know when the furniture is going to be delivered. I could ask my son, but he’s sleeping, and besides, I don’t have a “need to know”.

I pruned back my walnut tree, and also cut some wild roses which tend to encroach on the rest of the world. It really wasn’t too painful. I felt pretty good yesterday- a good day. WE had fajitas and margaritas for dinner. Super yum! And no diarrhea! Doesn’t get much better than this. Good days and bad days. Good gorilla.

Our son showed last evening. I found part of the communication problem was that I had the wrong number for his cell in my cell. Dumb.

The Wimbledon woman’s final (or ladies as they call it) was a good match. The Williams sisters met again- Venus won. Today is the men’s (or gentleman’s) and Fedderer will meet Nadel again. They just came out on the court. My money is on Roger. I’ve got 3 HDTV sets around the place, one in the family room, one here on my desk, and one in the bedroom. About the only thing I can do any more is watch TV, so I thought I’d get the best TV I can. HD is really nice. I mostly watch sports, tennis now, baseball when I can, and just about all of it is available in HD. I root for the Cubs and the Yankees, and there are a lot of both of them on, so it works well. I can’t read much any more; I can’t focus long enough to follow a plot of a book. An old work buddy dropped by the other day and brought me a copy of Jimmy Buffet’s “Swine Not?” which is sufficiently light so that I could read it and enjoy it. No margaritas! Yeah, that Jimmy Buffet. Kind of a fun story about a family who move to NYC and live in a penthouse in a luxury hotel (the mom is a chef in the hotel) with a pet pig who is not supposed to be there. The pig can speak to other animals, and to us, but not to the characters in the book. There is soccer and a Beckham-like character and some other stuff too. Plot is a little thin, about right for this kind of book. Newsweek suggested it as a good beach read. AS I said, kinda fun. I can read magazine articles too. I sent in a sub to the “Economist” last week so I’ll get another weekly.

Rainy day in the Enchanted Forest. I heard it during the night, and it was still coming down when the dog and I went down for the paper. (The dog thinks this is his morning walk, so don’t tell him it’s really to get the paper.) The EF is really green in the rain. Nice. I have to cut a branch on one of the Black Walnut trees which have volunteered between the lawn and the road. I hate to do it- hate to cut trees, especially walnut, but it hit me in the head when I mowed there so the branch has to go. Needs cut, as they would say here.

I’m trying coffee again. I’m also eating doughnuts with it. Talk about junk food! I did have gross eggs earlier, so I’m not totally decadent.

The gorilla is being quiet today, at least so far. I have good days and bad days; looks like today will be a good ‘un.

Memo to my family- If anyone has any information on the location or plans of our son, we’d like it. We expected him yesterday, but didn’t see him. I tried his cell, but it says that number is no longer in service, so I guess he’s changing to a Maine number, but we don’t have that.

Diarrhea here we come,
Right back where we started from.

We had some chicken salad for dinner, which went right through in a few hours. Totally gross, not to mention painful. It’s the gas that is painful; once that passes it’s not bad.

This gorilla is really nasty. Every time I think my system is settling down, it gives me another shot. Diarrhea had become a few times a week, and not severe, if you take my meaning. But this was a real heavy-duty shot. Oatmeal sets it off big time. Oatmeal? Why oatmeal? Scottish soul food! The chicken salad was made fresh- no old stuff which might have picked up something else. Back to junk food!

Rainy day in the Enchanted Forest. I heard the rain on the leaves in the middle of the night, and this AM the rain is out of the east. East wind, rain. A bit of trivia for y’all: on December 6 1941 the Japanese government broadcast those words which were the code to attack Pearl Harbor. The rest is history.

A Glorious Fourth to y’all! This is one of most favorite holidays. It’s sort of clean in the sense that we all can celebrate together without someone getting his or her nose out of joint for some obscure reason the rest of can’t understand. So get out there and celebrate! Grill something, watch fireworks, etc.

Another wasted trip to Danville. We left home at 8:30, got to the hospital on time, and had blood taken. Then I had vitals taken, and saw Dr W. My white blood counts are too low again, so no chemo this week. He said some people are just that way- every 3 weeks work better. Maybe I’m one of the, He’s also looking into the insurance issues with giving me a long lasting Neupogen, which raises WBC. Blood pressure is back up to healthy levels, weight is down, which is not a good sign. WE had a discussion about pain killer- he said it’s not unusual to have the oxycontin be gone before 12 hours, as I seem to be doing. He said he could give me a stronger formulation or I could take it every 8 hours. I chose to keep doing what I’m doing, which is take an oxycodone after about 10 hours to carry me through the transition. I’ll do that. Every 8 hours would interfere with sleep or not be 8 hours. This way I have a nice even base with the spike on top.

I did change the second emergency person to be notified from son to eldest daughter.

Looks like a little rain in the offing; I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance. Guess I’ll take a good nap, then see what else I can do.

Today we finished up what I think is the last of the essential paperwork- the Power of Attorney for health care. My son the lawyer drafted one up and I edited it appropriately and then printed it out. That was the easy part- then I had to get two witnesses to meet me at the AAA office to notarize it. This allows Mom the make any medical decisions needed if I am unable to do so. Anyway, it's done. I learned this from my Mom who died about 10 years ago. She was very sick, with congestive heart failure, and told the hospital she wanted to leave. They wanted to discharge her, even though she was obviously not thinking clearly. I whipped the POA on them and things became much simpler.

I’m eating ages old GORP from the freezer. It’s a little soggy, but quite good.

Tomorrow, Thursday, is the next chemo treatment at the hospital. We have to be there at 9:30, so leave here at 8:30, so no time to blog. I’ll get back to y’all after the chemo, which may be late in the afternoon. So don’t panic if there is no blog early.

Thanks to Maggie’s blogfriend A, who suggested the new title.

The gorilla is not being very cooperative. I took a nap in the AM, which made me feel worse- kind of painy in my GI tract. After lunch I did a short trip to Wal-Mart for junk food. Dr S at Penn told me I should be eating the junk food diet. Everything I was always taught was bad to eat is now good, and vice versa. Veggies are out, pizza is in. There is certainly no issue with gaining weight. I lost about 80 lbs, which left me right around 160, where I seem to be sticking, at least for now. And because the cancer is around the GI tract, there is not much room for expansion, so no big meals. The best thing is to eat almost continuously. Then there is the diarrhea issue, of which more later, which is a real pain in the butt. (pun intended.)

The short trip to Wally World wiped me out again. But I stocked up on frozen pizza and toasted sandwiches. Then I spent the afternoon sleeping, had a microwave pizza for dinner, and slept the evening too. Of course I paid for all that at 4 AM when I was wide awake!

Today looks like a better day, in spite of the morning cold. It was 52! IN July! The Enchanted Forest is very pretty today. We had a heavy dew, and now bright sun. Even the bugs are staying away. The bunnies were rioting on the lawn, a young robin was practicing touch-and-go on the driveway, and the birds were singing. Nice!

Good morning, especially to those of you who got here from the link in my lovely daughter Maggie's blog. It is the 800 lb gorilla. I named it after all the off-spring were here for a weekend and nobody ever mentioned cancer. And as Maggie says, it can do anything it wants to.

Good night, but starting out to be a bad day. Weather in the EF is cloudy and kinda dank, although still warm. Buggy too- got bit on the neck while out to get the paper and walk the dog. I took my usual oxycodone at 5:40, and oxycontin at 8, but I'm kinda uncomfortable. There's a dull delocalized pain in the gut, which is where the cancer is. Dr S said that's the one to worry about; the growth in the lungs and liver is not to worry about.

Had my usual gross eggs for breakfast, followed by Bear Naked Granola and Boost. Mom points out that there is Gorp in the freezer from years ago which fits into the present eating pattern. I'll have to get some out and try it.

I have to print out the shopping list for Mom this morning, and then install the blog software on the laptop. Busy, busy. And don't forget a nap. I bought a really nice Dell laptop when they told me I had a clean bill of health. I figured it would be great for travelling, and it would have been, but it's nice at home too.

Most frustrating thing about this is I spent a lot of time getting things to run smoothly, and now I'm not able to enjoy them. Like the house in the EF- it's really nice with the trees growing up out front and all.

Things seem to going OK on the Northern Front. Wish I could have been there to help.